just thought I would let you know I am locked up again (few days ago). I left the keys on Sarah's table following her period, well just before it was going to finish and when I came to bed the keys were gone, so I took the signal and locked it up.
Next morning I discovered she had not put them away just moved them...grrrr, so I asked her if she was ready or not, not to put her under any pressure or anything, and she said yep she was ready and would put them away.
Alas that night she STILL had not put them away so here I am walking around caged up but with easy access to the keys, hmmm thats not good, I am just wondering if she is humoring me.
So I ask her this time if she wants to wait another month, after new years, that she can give me the keys back and leave it alone, no pressure, bla bla...all said very nicely, Sarah said nope your not having them back.....
But then I just don't get it, after giving her loads of attention last night, just back rubs, Sarah won't allow me to pleasure her without intercourse, she does not see the point....she STILL did not put them away in the morning...
FFS, anyways I could not hide my frustration, she claimed she has other priorities on her mind.
sheesh its not that hard to hide some friggin keys is it???
Anyways she did eventually, but I am still wondering what its all for. I like her being in control but leaving the keys out leaves me in control, self control, and to be honest I just don't have any when it comes to opportunities to self satisfy.
I don't feel in the right frame of mind presently, there are other reasons for this. I don't expect to be let out before new years though. The extra tight ring is giving me a bit of grief because the diameter is not quite enough for there not to be some fold in the skin somewhere and this seems to be causing some pain at night when i am not able to adjust myself. that said if I were having nocturnal erections wearing this size ring would be impossible. circulation is no problem, everything remains a nice pink color.
I think I am going to stop talking about my attempts to lower my libido, it just seems people do not understand. Not one person has indicated positively or understand my position, and I feel it is because either
1. If there is d r u gs involved it must be bad.
2. The have not spent the HOURS of research that I have, or understand how careful I am being. tiny little steps.
No I am not a doctor but I did have (still have) the intellect to be one if I had of chosen that for my profession. I am smart enough to know what I am doing thanks
people have two choices when they are in a relationship.
cruise on and hope things work themselves out
or do what it takes and that may mean anything, go to any lengths to make their relationship the best it can be.
I have chosen the later. I am very sensitive to what Sarah wants and needs, and I have found a way to soften the dark side of the wolf in me. I know our relationship is uneven, I wish Sarah would respond more, i also think she is slightly insane, but then many of you would say that about me.
life is a journey and I am exploring avenues, I will make mistakes like most people, but they will be with the best of intentions not based on some kinky fantasy.
While i won't deny there is not some fantasy involved in a FLR, I am also realistic about the reality of life.
I would love Sarah to sit on my face and grab my caged cock and give me instructions for the day and tell me that if they are not done to her liking then she might just drop the keys in a vat of acid....i can visualize her absolutely stunning petite butt descending on to my face and her so silkened milk white soft cheeks coming to rest on either side of my face, I can even taste the scent of her. The picture of her perfect pussy, the shape the texture, the soft clam of pearls. I can feel her grab my cock encased in the hard plastic, instantly trying to find a way to escape, the extra tight ring begins to bite into my flesh, as Sarah uses it to change her gears during her instruction.
Yes, putty I would be.
Regrettably that is only in my minds eye.
The reality is somewhat more like I give her unpressured massages for an hour at night and in the morning, and my reward is her smile, and a non wavering look into each others eyes, that says I appreciate you as a person, and I love what you are trying to do, or simply a exchange of knowledge that we are closer as a couple.
I hope thats where we end up this session, the previous one was nearly there but Sarah backed away. perhaps this time.
i think I probably should have waited till next cycle tho....
1 comment:
Oh, that unrequited lust!
Damn, in a lesser way than you feel, I understand your frustration. I am in an FLR only because I chose to serve my wife, and she graciously accepted it. It is not because she requested it of me. All is mostly well here, but as you, I just don't get enough. But then again, I was not getting enough when we were "vanilla". Then, as now, I could push it, but pushing was not, and is not now satisfactory. Whereas now, she is happy, and I am happy that she is happy.
But then, you are not me, and Sarah is not my wife, so there is only an analogous relationship that is the basis of comparison.
I feel sorry for your plight. I understand that your sex drive may be greater than mine, so I can't really feel what you feel. Then again, we really don't know. Maybe it is a matter of choice. As a man, do you want to accept Sarah, regardless of your unfulfilled needs, or do you want your needs fulfilled and change or, heaven forbid, dump Sarah?
It is obvious that you are not satisfied. Ask her whether she is, and what the two of you can do about it. I hope that there is some good common ground between the two of you that will give both some satisfaction. But don't wait for total satisfaction. Not even in my dreams will that happen.
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