Wednesday, April 04, 2007

A belligerent Post

I probably should change the name of this blog from Journey into a wife lead marriage and change it to Married with a cage.

Sarah loves to be treated like a queen, She loves the massages, the attention, the special things that one can do, but I am coming to a conclusion that she is a lazy leader of our marriage.

That said I guess I have not gone into subspace yet, I caged myself a few nights ago, and I start to feel the trickles of subspace drifting in.

I tried to behave as identical as I could the last few weeks, and I had one crap sex session, then one great sex session then most recently it was crap again. So much for the well behaved correlation with good sex. It seems Sarah likes the cage, we have 100% hit rate then. Admittedly I go completely on overdrive when I am caged, I can’t stop massaging her, touching her wanting to be with her, like I said last time, it did my head in, so I needed a break. I still don’t know if its worth it or not, some would say anything is worth it to make your spouse, to make your marriage work, and it is true to a point.

I just miss wanking soooo much, I love it, I would rather make love to Sarah of course but making love to her 4-5 times a day is not going to happen in this reality, I would even give up wanking if I got to make love to Sarah once a day or probably even 2 or 3 times a week, nar 3 times a week…but once every 10 days on average…nope, my biceps are keeping on keeping on.

But not this week.

Oh no

I locked the fuckin lock again didn’t I

And I know jiggling the cage sucks big time, I would rather be in subspace and enjoy my rampant imagination at everything that looks remotely female wandering by.

I think in some respects its fortunate I have a cage on because I could see how one could take a woman by force , I would never do that of course all I am saying is I understand the forces that could drive a man. Wearing a cage sharpens your focus, it turns on a mans senses, it turns him into a hunter of sex. I look at a woman in the gym, the supermarket, the petrol station and the vivid images of us (whoever my target is) fucking tease my mind and my encaged cock. And vivid it is, it is a truly amazing thing the mind, how quickly is can determine what a woman’s body will look like naked under their cloths.

Women may as well not wear cloths, because I can undress them almost instantly in my mind and know what they will be like, if they will have dimples in their thighs, even the flexibility of their legs, how far they will be able to open them and be able to receive me. I will know if the texture of their skin is soft and white, or hard and rough, if their likely to swell up into a soft moist flower or be a tight grommet or loose gasket, if they are likely to enjoy the sharing of breath, a look in the eyes, if they are bold or if submissive.

I can tell by their faces what their breasts will be like, if they will be firm or motherly, succulent or empty, a handful or just a nipple to play with and tweek between a thumb and a forefinger.

Yes ladies a rampant man can undress you, and fuck you without even touching you, we take you all the time and you don’t even know it.

What many women fail to understand is that it matters not what their physical attributes are like, all women are worth fucking, all women have a hidden sexuality that once found can make a man willing to move mountains for them, it is just a matter of them finding it. Some do it naturally, you know, that frumpy girl that has a aura about her that just makes her sexy even though she is not anything to look at.

A womans aura, it overrides any physical attribute they may have, and in fact can enhance whatever physical attribute they are born with

Their sexually empowers them, find a honry man and he will climb mountains for you.

Why do women fail to see this energy they have, why do they not use it, what is their hang up about utilizing their sexual energy?

Truth is when I get home and I see Sarah, she is the only woman in the world, its like everything during the day has been a build up to her, and when I see her my whole being shrieks to me that I want her, I need her and I love her, all those vivid scenarios wash away and are replaced by a passion orders of magnitude more powerful, more important and more fulfilling, just if only Sarah would / could use it, and acknowledge it.

Perhaps by having a break this time Sarah might make more of an effort to acknowledge her power over me. Perhaps not, Sarah’s physical attributes are awesome for her age, and I am very lucky in that respect, but I would swap those same attributes for a woman who is prepared to embrace her sexuality any day.

There is inklings though.

When I told her a few nights ago that I was once again at her mercy (that’s how I tell her, that I am again at her mercy), she more or less said about time, and she has certainly being ordering her share of massages, even allowing me to view her bare bottom for a time (a big deal for me, and yes I know what it looks like but there is nothing like real flesh to make ones mouth drool). I think she even managed a hug for me. I sense that the break did her good as well as me, this morning when I woke her with a massage and a in bed coffee she told me how nice it was to be woken that way, contrast back a year ago when cage time started out and I would be berated for waking her period!.

Yes Sarah likes the cage, but I am not yet in subspace, or in total horny space, or whatever space it is. I still wonder if it is worth all the wanks I have already given up, but I am in an asshole mood today, a belligerent, alpha male mood. Can’t u tell?

Still I will probably be bloging more over the next week or so, that’s what happens when I am caged up, I need to write about it to sort out my own head.

Right now I am calm, I know after 6 or so weeks of caging (with release every 10 days or so) my sex drives falls right off, as does my ability to masturbate. After my long stint of being locked up it took a few weeks before I was able to return to my normal masturbation habits, but once its returned it seems my body is determined to make up for lost time and my drive over shoots normality and I will do it until it hurts.

I wonder where it will lead this time

BTW on a more submissive note, I bought a new solid ring for the cage, its smaller than the one I use now, its going to hurt more at night but it will make the cage virtually escape proof, its also going to be hard to put on. I practiced with the hinge one that came with the cb3000 and it took some doing getting both balls through. I have worn the hinged one in that size at night before a long time ago before Sarah knew about the cage and I am a bit anxious about Sarah controlling that lock up. I am also getting a stainless steel metal locking pin which will help stop ring movement, and of course remove the easy escape of using side cutters on the plastic pin