Its nearly Christmas

Its so near to Christmas and there is so little time to do anything.

I have been way too busy to write to this blog until recently. Our trip to the states was brilliant and the kids had an absolute ball. We visited Disneyland in both LA and Florida, and now in the lead up to Christmas making a mad last minute rush to buy pressys etc.

Actually it was our anniversary recently and I am ashamed to admit that I forgot all about it, fortunately or not Sarah also forgot completely, although Sarah never remembers, I think I will buy her some flowers and a card today and give her a belated offering.

There has been no further cage talk, or anything pertaining to D/S, like so many other blogs I have read it seems that the time of the year is just too busy to entertain such activities, I know that it’s the furthest thing from Sarah’s mind, although I doubt she would label it as such.

I have however in my spare minutes such as when I drift of to sleep being taking advantage of my freedom and doing a fair amount of fantasizing about where I would like to go when things settle down next year, although of course the key in a female lead relationship is for our relationship to go where Sarah wants it too. I have read much about toping from the bottom and I am very conscious about this, however I still intend to present the full version of “around her finger” to Sarah for her approval. I may also make some additions with some references to chastity and also some games that may interest her.

I think that it is better that she read it as if someone else has written it as suggestive than if I directly suggest it since it gives her an opportunity to evaluate and accept or reject what she chooses without rejecting me. I will merely tell Sarah in handing to her that I am happy for her to choose anything and apply how she chooses, in this way I hope to avoid “toping from the bottom” by making suggestion rather than telling her directly it is my wish. Of course if she asks me then I will answer truthfully.

One of the key aspects of “Around her finger” is orgasm control, ie the woman has full control of the mans orgasm to the point where the woman may or may not give the man permission to orgasm during sex. This is something that drives me crazy and for what reason I can not fathom because I know it would be extremely frustrating in actuality particularly after being locked away and denied self pleasure for a lengthy period. I do not know if Sarah would actually do it or not but certainly an extension of this is punishment if I am unable to hold back would be cream (forgive the pun) on the cake.

I am gradually formulating a list of suggestions in three categories. Treats, punishments and releases. Sarah may decide on a given night what I am to have. This is still in genesis and I probably won’t have time to write it all out properly till next year.

Treats for me aka servitude to Sarah:

Full body massage for Sarah

Neck massage

Foot massage

Oral worship (I wish, more of a treat for me).

Punishments may include

Lock keys in safe for 2 weeks using timelock, then Sarah gets key at the end

Wear points in cage for a night (aka painful night time)

Spanking with wooden spoon

Releases or sexual attention:

1. Normal Vanilla Straight sex (although I never cum before Sarah)

2. Normal vanilla sex but Sarah must tell me when to cum otherwise I just don’t.

3. Delayed orgasm, Sarah climaxes but I have to wait until the morning before I am allowed to masturbate. A real treat would be to be able to look at her bare butt while I do it.

4. Climax for Sarah but no orgasm at all for me, relocked in the morning following shower on my word of no release. Variations of this (and this for some reason drives me nuts) may be using sensation reducing condoms, or even I read somewhere about a mistress who had her partner wrap string around his stiff member, the loops very close together so basicly it made his shaft thicker, then roll a condom over the top. The result is a thicker cock with bumps (from the string) but no sensations other than the pressure of the string would get through. Of course no fluid release for me in this one may mean jump to #5

5. Prostate massage via dildo, strapon or aneros, ie cage is not removed at all, Sarah may simply tell me to do it, or if she wants to do it (unlikely) then cool.

One of the things that Sarah seems to struggle with is that if there is any sexual attention then I may as well take the cage off and have sex. She does not see the point in me bringing her to orgasm and me not also climaxing. I can see her rational and I am not sure how to encourage her to try it, even once. I think the only way for me to start his is by encouraging her to say no to me during vanilla sex and me forgo my orgasm for the week, yet this is also VERY hard for me because after going 7-10 days in the cage I really NEED release and the prospect of no release for another long period is daunting. Ideally I would love her to allow me the pleasure of bring her to orgasm once in-between my releases. I think I need to demonstrate that I am really serious about her having TOTAL control over my orgasms and that I am not going to get the shits if she says no.

Please feel free to make any suggestions to my categories of punishments/treats or releases, although please remember that Sarah is fairly vanilla, although I don’t have a problem of letting her read about Prostate massaging, although I probably would not actually ask her to do it in case she called me a sick puppy..lol. Sarah is not really a stranger to anal play with her on the receiving end, and liking it (when the mood is right)

I guess I had better hurry up and change the bathroom door locks